Government planning campus lockdown to stop spread of left wing views

23 Jun 2021

I understand that the government are planning a fresh lockdown to stop the spread of left wing views on university campuses.

The cabinet are agreed that “cancel culture” is by far he biggest threat currently facing this country. Campuses and students are considered to be “superspreaders” of a fast-mutating virus which affects humans, but far more significantly, as we have seen in Bristol, stone.

Official figures so far have seen 218,000 cases of students contracting such diseased ideas as Black Lives Matter, 813,000 reported cases of cancellation and statue fatalities reporting to be running out of control.

Gavin Williamson, education secretary said: “For now, we are asking students to stay in their rooms and avoid socialising as this can lead to the exchange of dangerous, airborne transmitted radical notions which not even the herd immunity of tabloid readership could resist.

“We have made repeated efforts to provide an antidote to the spread of cancel culture, an effort spearheaded by social experts including Julia Hartley-Brewer, Jeremy Clarkson and Melanie Phillips.

“However, irrational resistance to their scientific expertise has severely diminished their influence. Yes, they have a foothold in The Daily Telegraph, Mail, Express, Sun, Question Time, The Moral Maze.

“But all of this is as nothing if they cannot get a fair hearing in The Morning Star, Tribune, or the Exeter University freesheet the Red Clarion.

“Sure, there’s COVID but when all’s said and done that’s the flu and you drones are going to have to get back to work sooner rather than later.

“Cancel Culture, however, represents something far worse – total extinction. The likes of Robert Jenrick, Toby Young, wiped out forever. We must do all we can to avert such a horrific prospect.”

David Stubbs

The ongoing thoughts of Chairman Stubbs, ranging from the wry and sidelong to the windy and highminded and apoplectic, depending on how much alcohol consumed at the time of writing.